DMC News: Parenting the Heart

Monday, January 12, 2009

Fathers (and mothers), perhaps you can control behavior for awhile, but don't overlook your child's heart...more

pdug said...: I wonder if everything Morley says there would stand up to rigorous scrutiny. It sounds pretty good.

But didn't you yourself just preach that God offers "rewards" for obedience to his commands, particulalrly in the parent-child relationship? It would seem like reward and punishment is also "God's" way.

And if God looks on the heart and man doesn't isn't that because man *can't* look on the heart?

The article prompts me to ask alot of questions.; 3:34 PM
M Clark said...: Reward and punishment are essential in training a child to be obedient. If I read Morley correctly, he is not rejecting such tools, but rather making the point that behavior does not necessarily reveal what is in the heart. I made the point that fathers often misinterpret the obedience of their children as showing him respect, when in reality their children are merely protecting themselves from their fathers' anger.

As fathers, we are to think in terms of nourishing our children, which we best do when we give attention to what's going on inside of them.

That's the usual focus of our wives who often thankfully counterbalance our focus on obedience by calling our attention to how our children actually feel.; 7:33 PM